You're a Soldier (Never Was a Thug, Just Infatuated With Guns)

It's hard not to tease Harry and his choices of posts after I've privately and publicly berated him to write, considering that's the exact sort of passive-aggressive, hot-and-cold behavior that has cost me more than one girlfriend. But, c'mon, you got to like a guy who doesn't write unless he's hitting us up for money. Trés college-student, no?

In any case, a post is a post is a post, so I'll -- happily -- respond. Harry is right in saying that his support for the President's "Freedom Agenda" has caused him to be the recipient of some mockery. However, the rationale is not quite what he suggests. Only speaking for myself, I again posit to Harry that I defy him to produce one intelligent American who doesn't support "the ultimate goal of ending tyranny." Is there really a rash of pro-tyrant voters in the electorate we need to battle? No, clearly, my hestitation to embrace Bush's agenda in this particular case has all to do with his actions not matching the rhetoric and, yes, the utterly flawed methodology -- both caveats Harry admits to sharing in his post. So what are we talkin' 'bout here?

The real news in the post below, instead, is Harry's apparent (and rather secretive) intermittent desire to join the military. It's hard to write through this affixed wry smile, but I'll try. First, I'd ask if Harry is aware that a popped-collar is not exactly full dress uniform in the Marine code. This is a man who irons a shirt every day -- certainly common practice working on Capitol Hill, but might be a tough transition to the trenches, is all I'm saying. I'm just guessing that this man is going to have a rocky path in morphing into this one. Also, a large aspect of the mirth is the subtle reminder I'm apparently going to have to give ol' Harry. Chief: You don't live with your mother anymore. She's a continent away, as is whatever baseball bat still resides at your parents' house. If fear of filial injury is the sole criterion by which you're avoiding a few years in Fallujah, I dare say you're in the clear.

Also, I think you're selling yourself short. Not everyone can join the military to work toward global freedom. You -- along with the rest of us -- have to use the skills and passions we possess to make a better tomorrow. Gunplay ain't your thing, amigo-- your place is at Oxford or LSE (not a hypothetical, by the way) using your pretty blonde head to come up with the ideas that will set the stage for the sort of military/geo-political changes you've called for in your academic life. Voltaire once said, "No problem can withstand the assault of sustained thinking." You don't need to work to get a man elected, or pick up a gun or even raise cash. It's in academia that you're going to begin to make a difference -- even if your mother could swing a 3,000 mile-long baseball bat.

P.S. I have to ask: You request the parents of "Henry and Gerald" to donate money to your organizations that I have no doubt do a lot of good (along with the more, ah, amusing donations). I'd make sure I do so (they'll get right on it, I'm sure) but you seem to have substituted the name "Henry" for mine. Odd. Did you intend to refer to my brother, Calvin Still-in-Schoolidge, to avoid me asking our parents for the cash? Alright, fair enough -- Cal, this one's on you.